WHAT ARE CORRESPONDENCES?

Everything has certain elemental qualities, which are called “correspondences” . Just as we are all born uder a certain sign of the zodiac, and just as our gender, race, nationality, and individual upbriging influence our characters and personal qualities, so correspondences influence the different elements and tools we might use to perform magick. Carefully choosing elements with the right correspondences can help to insure the success of your magickal endevours! Below are Wiccan interpretations of elemental correspondences and phases for moon magick.GENDER CORRESPONDENCESMasculine elements are strong and active. Use for protection, purification, hex-breaking, exorcism, lust, sexual potency, health, strength, courage, financial success.Feminine elements are subtler and softer. Use to attract love, increase beauty, youth, healing, psychic abilities, increase fertility, draw wealth, promote happiness and peace, aid sleep and cause visions.

ELEMENTAL CORRESPONDENCES

Earth- A Feminine element.
Direction- North.
Color- green.
Elemental beings are gnomes.
Earth Animals are the wolf, owl, dragon, stag, and wild cats.
Stones are onyx, jade, amethyst, and flourite.
Rules spells dealing with fertility, jobs, money, business, health, ecology and nature, and stability.

Air- A Masculine element.
Direction- East.
Color- yellow.
Elemental beings are sylphs.
Air animals are doves, the wolf, fox, deer, and turtle.
Stones are moonstone, tourquoise, and rhodochrosite.
Rules spells dealing with memory, intellect, test taking, divination and psychic ability, travel, and overcoming addictions.

Fire- A Masculine element.
Direction- South.
Color- red.
Elemental beings are salamanders.
Fire animals are the porcupine, coyote, fox, squirrel, hawk, mouse, deer, bear, and snakes.
Stones are amber, citrine, smoky crystals, gold, and copper.
Fire rules spells dealing with success, sex, illness, protection, legal matters, competitions, strength, and energy.

Water- A Feminine element.
Direction- West.
Color-blue.
Elemental beings are undines.
Animals are all sea mammals and sea birds, fish, night creatures, and the raven.
Stones are silver, river rocks, amethyst, coral, seashells, and rainbow colored crystals.
Water rules spells dealing with love, friendship, meditation, healing, dreams, childbirth, clairvoyance and purification.
 

PLANETARY CORRESPONDENCES

Moon- Goddess mysteries, women’s health, the home, children, prophetic dreams, reincarnation, sleep, emotional healing.

Sun- God mysteries, physical health, employment, leadership, prosperity, money, the performing arts and celebrity, self confidence, and new ventures.

Mercury- The intellect, communications written or spoken, teaching and learning, travel, diplomacy, influencing others.

Venus- Inner and outer beauty, love, romance, family, the creative arts, friendship, gardening, peace, happiness, fertility and sexuality.

Mars- Passion, force, power, lust, courage, strength of will, the military, physical exertion, machinery, and competition.

Jupiter- Money, prosperity, success, legal judgements, luck, friendship, investments, social gatherings, ambition, the seeking and granting of favors.

Saturn- Land and real estate, past lives, overcoming self-sabotage, lies, and losses, learning life’s lessons and protection from psychic attack.

Uranus- Unexpected changes, higher consciousness, metaphysics, new inventions, regathering scattered energies, clairvoyance, freedom, and independence.

Neptune- Inner vision and perception, intuition, dreams, divination, chaos, confusion and revolution.

Pluto- Death, transformations, astral travel, the otherworld, materializations, transfigurations, and metamorphosis.

DAILY CORRESPONDENCES

Sunday- Ruled by the Sun. Power, prosperity, health, banishing evil annd excorcism.

Monday- Ruled by the Moon. Intuition, dreams, psychic ability, female fertility, and the Goddess.

Tuesday- Ruled by Mars. Courage, energy, and physical strength. Banishing negativity.

Wednesday- Ruled by Mercury. Divination, communications, knowledge, wisdom, and study.

Thursday- Ruled by Jupiter. Good luck, wealth, healing, male fertility, legal matters.

Friday- Ruled by Venus. Love, sex, marriage, fertility and friendship.

Saturday- Ruled by Saturn. Psychic ability, meditation, and communication with spirits.

MOON PHASE CORRESPONDENCES

New Moon- New Moon magick begins on the day of the new moon to three-and-a- half days after. Use the energy of the new moon for new ventures and new beginnings. Also use the new moon for love spells, job hunting, and healing.

Waxing Moon- The waxing moon begins seven to fourteen days after the new moon. Use the waxing moon for constructive magick, such as llove spells, magiick for wealth and success, courage, friendship, luck or good health.

Full Moon- A powerful energy for rituals of prophecy, divination and protection. Any spellwork that requires extra energy, such as finding a new job or healing serious conditions, is best begun during the full moon. Also for love, gaining sacred knowledge, legal matters, attracting money and prophetic dreams.

Waning Moon- Begin waning moon magick three-and-a- half to ten-and-a-half days after the full moon. The waning moon is used for banishing negativity, for curing addictions, and illness.

New Moon- The energy of the dark moon is useful for working magick against attackers, and for understanding your own angers and passions. Also for rituals designed to bring justice to bear in very negative situations.

The Moon spends a day or two each month in each of the twelve signs of the zodiac. The sign the moon is transiting through can be used to good advantage during spellwork.

Moon in Aries- A good time to perform spells related to job ventures and all new projects related to money. Also a good time to develop strength and courage, and lust spells. This is not a good moon for performing divination.

Moon in Taurus- This moon is excellent for spellwork relatd to love, creativity, and inner peace. Spells done at this time take the longest to manifest, but the results will be very long lasting and be stable.

Moon in Gemini- The perfect time for spells dealing with communications, healing, and uncrossing spells. Be careful- the moon in Gemini can be unpredictable and unstable.

Moon in Cancer- Excellent for any spell involving the home, fertility, children, or divination.

Moon in Leo- Spells involving leadership, prosperity, fame and career are best done in Leo, but do not perform any spells involving love, or any other emotion, as Leo may actually counteract it.

Moon in Virgo- This moon ensures a spell which involves meticulous detail, especially spells involving education, healing, and stability.

Moon in Libra- Excellent for working a spell with a partner, and for magick involving marriage, couples, partnership, peace, and fairness.

Moon in Scorpio- Use this energy for mysteries, the occult, divination, and sex magick.

Moon in Sagittarius- This is an excellent time to experiment with new techniques or magick spells, but it is not a good time for psychic worrk or divination.

Moon in Capricorn- Perfect for spells to manifest life’s basiic needs and for stability.

Moon in Aquarius- The best time to work on behalf of others, but consciously stay focused on your heart to maintain a higher consciousness with others, and to avoid selfish motives.

Moon in Pisces- Perfect for divination and psychic work, past life regressions, and communication with spirits.
Magickal Tools used in Wicca

Pentagram- Symbol of the element of Earth, all things material, and the Northern Quarter. Pentagrams are also symbolic of the unity of the 5 elements Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit.

Athame- Athames are traditional black-handled daggers, symbolic of the element of Air, all things spiritual, and the Eastern Quarter. Daggers are used to direct and send magickal energy.

Wand- Symbolic of the element of Fire, all things mental, and the Southern Quarter. Wands are also used to direct and send magickal energy.

Chalice- Symbolic of the element of Water, all things emotional, and the Western Quarter.

Altar- The place where magickal symbols and tools are placed for use during a ritual or spellwork.

Book of Shadows- A witch�s spell book and magickal diary, used to construct and record spells and rituals.

Candles- Used to represent the God and Goddess on the altar. Use candles of the appropriate color for the type of spellwork or ritual.

Essential Oils- Used for anointing candles and other ritual objects and tools. Use the oil apporopriate to the purpose desired.

Stones and gems- Crystals carry energy vibrations, and can subtly help to bring the energy vibrations within your body, aura and spellwork into balance. Use gems and stones with vibrations suited to your purpose.

Incense- Incense appropriate to the season, or to the magickal goal, is burned to help attune the witch to the goal of the spell.
Uses of common incense

Cedar- Purification and protection, spiritual growth andprosperity.

Cinnamon- Love, psychic ability, and protection.

Copal- Purification and cleansing of ritual space and stones.

Dragon’s Blood- Lust, courage, and sexuality.

Frankincense- Protection, spirituality, and consecration of ritual tools and space.

Jasmine- Love, peace, and prophetic dreams.

Juniper- Exorcism, healing and love magick.

Myrrh- Healing, protection, consecration of ritual tools and space, meditation.

Pine- Money, purification, and exorcism.

Rose- Love, psychic powers, healing, luck, protection, Domestic peace and happiness.

Sage- Spiritual growth, healing, and purification of the home and ritual space.

Sandalwood- Protection, healing, love and spiritual growth.

Vanilla- Love, seduction, mental powers, an aphrodisiac.  From WiccaSeekers

 

THE GODDESS

The triple moon is a Goddess symbol that represents the Maiden, Mother, and Crone as the waxing, full, and waning moon. It is also associated with feminine energy, mystery and psychic abilities.

THE GODDESS
The Goddess is the Mother Earth and the Creatress of the Universe. She is the moon and the cycles of life, as all woman have a cycle in which is the bringer of life. She is the light, the darkness, and everything in between. She is the mountians, the oceans, and the stars in the sky.
The Goddess is a triune being, meaning she has three forms. These forms are known as the Maiden, the Mother, and the Crone. As the Maiden she is the waxing moon. Other names for her are the Virgin or the Huntress. She is spring, the time of fresh beginnings for all living things. She is the repeating cycles of birth and rebirth, both of the spirit and of the body. The Maiden is the dawn, eternal youth, enchantment, and seduction. Her color is traditionally white, which represents innocence or newness. As the Mother she is the full moon. Other names for her are the Great Teacher or the Creatress. She is summer, the time of ripening of all living things. She is re-creation of life and the creation of universal bodies.She is the high point, or peak, of all cycles. The Mother is the day, lustiness, adulthood/motherhoo d, and reproduction. Her color is traditionally red, which represents blood or the life force. And as the Crone she is the waning moon. Other names for her are the
Terrible Mother, the Hag, the Dark Mother, or the Wise One. She is Winter, the time of death or the end of all cycles. She is the darkness, where all life rests before rebirth. The Crone is the night, the abyss, menopause, advancement of age, wisdom, the gateway to death, and reincarnation. Her colors are black and dark blue, which represents darkness or the absorber of all light.

It is important that everyone finds their own way of worshipping or not worshipping.
Worship of the Goddess means:

Following your own path

Freedom from fear

Freedom from dogma

Seeking the spirit

Celebration of life and all living things

Balance

Worship of the Goddess encouragesus to to develop our own personal power, to evoke an awareness of the other dimentions and to understand that the spirit infusses all things. It teaches us to respect all life, to follow our own inner path and gives us direct experiences of the Devine in the world and an awareness of cycle, celebration, ritual and magic.
The Goddess is not judgemental and does not reject but embraces all as part of her process. Her gifts to us are acceptance for who and what we are.
ASPECTS OF THE GODDESS
MAIDEN
MOTHER
CRONE

SPRING
WAXING MOON
INDEPENDENCE
CHALLENGE
IMBOLC

SUMMER
FULL MOON
CREATION/CREATIVITY
NOURISHMENT
SUMMER SOLSTICE

WINTER
WANING MOON
WISDOM/DEATH
REINCARNATION
YULE

THE TRIPPLE GODDESS
The Triple Moon is a Goddess symbol that represents the Maiden, Mother, and Crone as the Waxing, Full, and Waning Moon. It is also associated with feminine energy, mystery and psychic abilities.
THE MAIDEN
THE WAXING MOON
Represents spring, new beginnings, youth, enchantment, inception, excitement,and a carefree erotic aura. She is innocent in someways, but also a suductress who recognizes the power of her sexuality. Her traditional colour is white.
THE MOTHER
THE FULL MOON
Represents summer, fertility, fulfillment, givings, compassion, ripeness, stability, and power. She is the one who tenderly rocks the baby, but she is also the lioness who hunts to feed her offspring and will fight to the death to protect them. Her traditional colour is red.
THE CRONE
THE WANING MOON
Represents winter, wisdom, repose, and compassion. She is old age, experience, accumulated wisdom. She is the gateway to death, and the guide to rebirth. Her traditional colour is black.

This webset was assembled by Erin with Public Domain Tiles using one of the many auto-scripters available at Chat_Central_ Gateway All rights reserved KENDOC 2005

 

Tethered To The Earth

Tethered To The Earth
Existing In Bodies
The physical self can seem like an encumbrance at times. We have little control over its demands, we must monitor it consistently, and its relative fragility can be discomfiting. Many people, therefore, unconsciously long to escape the confinement of their bodies, and this longing can manifest itself as physical discomfort, difficulty adjusting to the rigors of day-to-day existence, or a tendency to shy away from all that is associated with the human earthly experience. Yet the lifetime of physical existence we each must endure represents a vital plateau in our progression as enlightened beings. We inhabit our bodies for a reason. There is much we can learn while coping with the challenges, sensations, and sensitivities of the human body that we could not have grasped had we remained in spirit form. When we leave our physical selves behind to return to our original state, we will enjoy a supreme sense of freedom-yet we will always value the time we spent on earth.

Being wholly present in your body can help you better understand how your time as a physical being is contributing to your development. There may be times when you feel that your consciousness is not grounded in your corporeal form. Your thoughts may seem scattered or spacey, or you may sense that your ethereal self is literally floating away. When this occurs, ask Mother Earth to ground you, or draw upon the potent grounding energy of mountains or trees. These powerful natural forces can help you reconnect with the earth by reminding you that living in a physical state can be a wholesome and enlightening experience. Wearing gemstones with grounding properties, bloodstone, for example, is another way to reaffirm your connection to the earthly plane.

Human beings are tied to the earth, but not wholly of the earth. We are each of us, for the time being, poised between the soil underneath our feet and the never-ending ethereal spaces around us. The unease we occasionally feel in our earthly bodies is merely a by-product of our innate understanding of our dual natures. But the time we spend in our physical bodies will not last and should thus be cherished. For one day, when our evolution is complete, we will return to the source of life to become beings of light once more.

What do you think?

http://forums. delphiforums. com/herbalmusing s/messages? msg=10019. 1

 

The Goddess Path

 

Many consider Witchcraft a Goddess religion.  We believe that the divinity of the male came from the Great Goddess. She wanted a companion, a son and, sometimes, a lover. He is differentiated from Her own divinity. He then spends the rest of his life cycle trying to become one with Her again, in a repetitive cycle of life, death and rebirth. His life is finite, but repetitive. Hers is eternal. As Her child, He is divine, but He does not approximate Her on the scale of divinity. His purposes are limited while Hers are all-encompassing.

The Goddess in most traditions is conceived primarily as a Moon Goddess having three aspects that correspond to the phases of the Moon. They are the Maiden (waxing crescent), the Mother (full Moon) and the Crone (waning crescent). Each contains aspects of the other. To others She is the sexual partner to Her Consort….. …a duality.

We honor Her as the Great Cosmic Mother of us all. It is She who birthed the world and lovingly tends it (and our) growth. Hers is the ability to create, whether it be children, great works of art and science or universes unending. Her hand guides the mysteries of the life cycle. Her heart beats at the center of all that is, was and will be. From Her comes our freedom to act as we will. She is expansive and fertile, moist, expectant and full. By the light of Her full face do we work our Magick and in Her honor do we gather. Part of Her dwells in all.

We honor Her as the Crone, the Wise One, the Dark Shining One, the Ancient One of Days. As guide of the inner self and director of souls. She forces us to face ourselves, our fears and our secret yearnings. She measures the thread of our lives and cuts it off only to begin spinning it again. Hers is the wisdom of experience, the insight of age—-the lesson and its learnings. She is wizened and dry, sterile and contracting. Her all-seeing eye peers at us in partiality from behind Her veil of mystery.

We know that the Goddess is much, much more than a Moon Goddess. She is also Mother Nature, Mother Earth, Gaia of the green and growing, Mountain Mother of craggy peaks. Running water is Her life’s blood and the oceans are the waters of Her womb which is the cauldron of rebirth.    Her spark of life and fiery passions burn within Her living core. The air is Her breath of inspiration, the storms its blowing out.

We honor Her as the creatress of the universe. It is She who sets the stars in their courses and spins the galaxies in space. As Queen of Heaven, She sits at the hub of the universe, whirling around without motion. In Her hands are the rising and setting of Sun and Moon, the birth and death of planets. She created the sun, the moon and the stars and we, her children, from her own womb, the sea which is the cauldron of life.   There are many imbalances in our society today, but the Goddess has re-emerged to help us find ways of restoring creation and of healing divisions, not of making them. The way of the Goddess is one of natural law and natural wisdom. Every one of us needs to drink of Her wisdom and realign ourselves with Her natural law.

Many traditions honor the Goddess and her Consort. However, the Goddess is considered to be more important in a practical sense, because Her power is manifest on the Earth in the growth of crops, the health of beasts, and the well-being of women and men. Many celebrate the Sabbats more on a spiritual celebration than on a sexual celebration. Moon rituals, whether they be Full or Dark, are sacred, spiritual and holy and in honor of the Goddess and Her mysteries only. The Sabbats are a time to celebrate with less formality, as it represents the turn of the wheel in our yearly life.

We feel everything comes from Her. The true, Old Religion was that of the worship of the Goddess. Witchcraft is a way of life and you need to connect with Her everyday whether it be by lighting a grateful candle, talking with Her, having a sanctuary in Her honor and visiting it, taking care of Her as earth, showing love and compassion for your fellow person, or taking care of Her many animals for She is in every living thing. She is the crops in the field, the earth that we walk on, the water that we drink, the food that we eat, every blade of grass that blows gently in the breeze; she is everything wild and free; She is the dormant tree waiting to be reborn again in the spring. She is the light drizzle of rain or the fearsome Hurricane. She is the great womb of the ocean nurturing its inhabitants. In the Goddess Path, we do not believe in the Goddess – we connect with Her; through the moon, the stars, the ocean, the earth, through trees, animals, through other human beings, through ourselves. She is here. She is within us all. She is the full circle: earth, air, fire and water and essence – body, mind, spirit, emotions, change. To connect with life, you connect with Her.

The Witch of yesteryear followed the Goddess and the Moon Cycles. Not only was she a Pagan, but she was wise in ways of the healing arts, of midwiving, of divination, of working with herbs and, of course, spells. When she planted her herbs and crops, she did not plant by the sun, but by the moon. She was later called a “Witch” during the Inquisition by Christians and tortured and burned.

In embracing the Goddess, we are bringing back the balance into this imbalance, material, masculine world we live in. We need more of the Goddess in order to do that. Each one of us, whether it be male or female, must reach into ourselves and find the feminine that is being smothered in this masculine, material world. What I mean by this is that physical energy is masculine energy. Non-physical, which is the feminine energy, is just that, non-physical. The terms relate to both sexes, as we each have male and female energies. We already have the duality in us. There is too much male energy (and I do not mean male gender) in this physical world we live in. We are busy in our daily lives working, raising a family, cooking, cleaning, running to softball, watching TV, just getting out of bed is masculine action because it takes energy and it is physical. Then we have road rage, violence, abuse, anger, fights, killings, etc., and all this is aggressiveness which is the masculine in us whether we are male or female. Yes, there is an imbalance but it is not enough of the Goddess. She is the non-physical. …things unseen and unable to touch……things that come from within….from the heart. Her teachings are love, compassion and kindness, which is what we need to practice more. When women and men’s actions come from the heart showing love, compassion and kindness, they are carrying the Goddess energy. The scale is still tipped very heavily on the masculine in each of us, and we need to balance it with more feminine energy, which is very hard to do. It is easier to be masculine than feminine. It is easier to vent anger than to control it. In coming into the Craft, we are asked “how do you come in” and the response is “In perfect love and perfect trust”. In other words, we are coming into the Craft through the Goddess. Worshiping the Goddess and Her Consort does not necessarily keep the scales balanced. In today’s lifestyle the scale is already tipped too far on the masculine side, the God side, to be able to right itself simply by honoring them both. In the “Crone Mysteries”, I go into great depth in the understanding of the Goddess principle and the need for bringing forth the feminine.

In casting a circle, the feminine energy is needed, because the feminine energy is considered to be the impregnator on the magical and spiritual planes; just as male is on the material plane. While both male and female are necessary for any act of procreation, whether physical or magical, in the magickal realm the flow of energy is not from the male to the female, but from the female to the male. Women tend to generate the etheric energy which is necessary to produce acts of sympathetic magic. Women tend to be more instinctively in touch with this etheric energy, the power of which will wax and wane.   Men need to learn to make use of this power by gaining access to their own inner feminine, which is very hard to do. While it is the feminine energy which takes the active role in magic, it is the feminine energy in us all and it is just that women naturally carry more of the feminine energy. Women are not better than men, we just have what is needed to cast a circle and to do magick simply because of the feminine within us. That is why it is always important that a woman cast the circle. Not only for the reasons above, but the circle also represents the womb of life and protection, which unfortunately, men do not have.

The need of the planet now is for us to become aware of the ethics, values and knowledge that are contained within the feminine system. We will destroy ourselves if we do not. It is the divine feminine energy that will heal and bring back the divine sacredness of compassion, love and kindness unto us all.

---

Source Unknown

 

Things to know about anger

Anger is a powerful emotion. It can be used either in productive or counter-productive ways. It can lengthen or shorten our lives. It is like electricity. It can run large equipment or it can electrocute you.
Here are more things to know about anger:

1. It is a powerful survival tool
2. It is a response to pain (physical or psychological)
3. It is a source of energy
4. It is a secondary emotion
5. When we are angry, the brain downshifts to a lower evolutionary level
6. Prolonged anger is unhealthy
7. Repressed anger is also unhealthy

Nature has developed the emotional state we call “anger” to help us stay alive. Anger sends signals to all parts of our body to help us fight or flee. It energizes us to prepare us for action. Many years ago we were threatened by wild animals who wanted to eat us. Now we more often feel threatened by other human beings, either psychologically or physically.

When we feel energized by anger, we might ask ourselves how we put this energy to the most productive use. As with the use of other forms of energy such as electricity or oil, we might want to use it efficiently, not wastefully.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _
Primary vs. Secondary Feelings

Perhaps the most helpful thing to remember about anger is that it is a secondary emotion. A primary feeling is what is felt immediately before we feel angry. We always feel something else first before we get angry.

We might first feel afraid, attacked, offended, disrespected, forced, trapped, or pressured. If any of these feelings are intense enough, we think of the emotion as anger.

Geneally speaking, secondary feelings do not identify the unmet emotional need (UEN). When all I can say is “I feel angry,” neither I nor any one else knows what would help me feel better. A helpful technique, then, is to always identify the primary emotion.
Here is an example. Assume someone wants us to do something we prefer not to do. At first we feel a little pressured, but not enough to get angry. When they keep pushing us, we begin to get irritated. If they continue, we get “angry”. Such anger damages often relationships. One suggestion on how to avoid getting angry in this case would be to express your initial feeling by saying “I feel pressured” before the feeling has escalated to the point of destructive anger. If the person respects your feelings and does not
them, they may stop their pressure. Even if they do not, I believe it is helpful to know what the specific feeling is. Knowing exactly how we feel with others and why helps us in several ways. First it raises our self-awareness in general. Second, it helps us communicate more precisely. Third, it helps us learn more quickly who respects our feelings and who we want to spend time with.

Anger as a Response to Fear

One of the primitive functions of an animal’s response to fear is to frighten away the attacker. But in modern human life, we often frighten away those who we need and care about most. Besides this, prolonged anger has clear health consequences. According to Dr. Herbert Benson, these include heart attacks, hardening of the arteries, strokes, hypertension, high blood pressure, heart rate changes and metabolism, muscle and respiratory problems. (The Relaxation Response, 1975)

Responding To and Learning From Anger

Anger is an intense emotion. It is evidence that we feel strongly about something. As with every emotion, it has a lesson for us. It can teach us what we value, what we need, what we lack, what we believe and what our insecurities are. It can help us become more aware of what we feel strongly about and which emotional needs are important to us. One way to learn from anger is shown in the example below:

Instead of saying, She never should have done that. I can’t believe how irresponsible, insensitive and inconsiderate she is. What a cold- hearted, evil witch she is.  A more productive response is:  I am really upset by this. Why does it bother me so much? What specifically am I feeling? What are my primary feelings? What need do I have that is not being met? What principles of mine have been violated?
From the answers to these questions, we can decide what course of action to take in view of what our goals are. Simply being aware that we have multiple options and that we can decide to pick the best one helps soothe the anger. It may help, for instance, to ask if we really want to frighten away the person we are angry at. As soon as we “upshift” and begin to think about our options and their consequences, and make appropriate plans, we start to feel more in control and less threatened. We get out of the automatic stimulus-response mode and realize that we have choices.

There is a quote which goes like this:

Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom. – Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning (bookstore)

It may be helpful for us to try to widen this space over our lives, and in fact this may be one of the signs of wisdom and maturity. It may give us an increased sense of control.  Simply remembering that we have a choice helps us feel more in control. I have found it helpful, for example, to identify when I am feeling provoked. Once I realize this I feel more in control of my response. Not surprisingly, studies show that people feel better and are healthier when they have a sense of control over their lives. This is where the balance between upper brain and lower brain comes in. High EQ suggests that we channel our anger in productive ways to help us achieve our goals rather than to sabotage them. Keeping our goals clearly in mind at all times helps us accomplish this.

Here are some suggestions for responding to your anger:

1. Ask what you are afraid of.
2. Ask what feelings preceded the anger.
3. Ask what other feelings you are feeling.
4. Ask what you are trying to control.
5. Ask what you can control.
6. Consider your options.
7. Choose the one which will bring you the most long term happiness.

Finally, here is a technique I sometimes use to help me cope with “anger” (if I haven’t already “downshifted” to a purely reactive animal instinct state). When I catch myself starting to say “I feel angry” or “I am starting to get really pissed off,” I say instead, “I feel really energized.” Then I ask myself how I want to channel my energy to its best use. It is a simple little technique, but sometimes it has made a big difference in how I feel and how I respond.

 

Earth Day April 22nd 2007

Observed in 175 countries, and coordinated by the non-profit Earth Day Network, www.earthday.org, Earth Day is the largest secular holiday in the world.

Earth Day is a time to celebrate gains we have made and create new visions to accelerate environmental progress. Earth Day is a time to unite around new actions. Earth Day and every day is a time to act to protect our planet.

Check your earth footprints here: http://www.earthsite.org/